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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28959339">Bugged</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinybears/pseuds/tinybears'>tinybears</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Ultimate Spider-Man (Cartoon 2012)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Good for her, Slow Burn, THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED, elle finally gets to be happy, okay its KINDA a slow burn, the yearning... Yeah</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:15:49</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,422</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28959339</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinybears/pseuds/tinybears</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The mission was fairly simple: Two people had to go undercover to a high-class auction and find out who was selling weapons abroad. The hard part? The invitations that S.H.I.E.L.D. acquired in the names of a Mr. and Mrs. Owens.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sam Alexander/Original Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Bugged</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When the Seraph landed on the McDonald’s roof near Broadway that cold November morning, Sam wanted to marry her on the spot. Hell, he had their first date planned out in his head, and all he had to do is wait for the perfect moment to lay that <em> “Nova Charm” </em> on her. Even after she confided in him about her dead ex-boyfriend ( <em> “He’s not </em> <b> <em>my</em> </b> <em> ex-boyfriend Sam! But… Gods, I guess he is…” </em> ), he was still willing to wait for her; wait until she was ready to love again. He dated some other girls in the meanwhile. There was his chemistry lab partner, the girl who sat across from him in English class… but they never really worked out. He always gave such bullshit reasons why it didn’t work ( <em> “She was a terrible kisser; I was ‘too short’ apparently” </em>), but he couldn’t lie to himself. The reason those relationships didn’t work was that they weren’t Elle. </p><p> </p><p>But he never did anything about it. But what could he do? Confess to Elle and scare her away from Earth for good? Absolutely not. So he waited. Every once in a while he’d flirt with her, just to get her to blush, maybe she’d even crack a smile if he was lucky. </p><p> </p><p>So he waited.</p><p> </p><p>The team <b>hated</b> this waiting game he played. They’d always known he liked her (Danny figured it out first, saying “ <em> I noticed the way he… relaxed around her. Truest sign of love there is </em> ”) At first they thought he’d pine over her for a few weeks, and then move on when she wasn’t liking his advances. Weeks turned into months, turned into years, which prompted Ava and the team to bet on when he was going to tell her. Whoever was the closest wins but with the answers being “20 years”, “On his wedding day”, “Right before one of them dies” (“ <em> Ava that is SO morbid!” “Yeah but God, how fucked up would it be!”), </em>and “Never”, they were not expecting to cash in any time soon.</p><p> </p><p>Especially not on this mission.</p><p> </p><p>It was fairly simple: Two people had to go undercover to a high-class auction and find out who was selling weapons abroad. The hard part? The invitations that S.H.I.E.L.D. acquired in the names of a Mr. and Mrs. Owens. </p><p> </p><p>“So they’re gonna have to pretend to be married? Why are we even taking this mission, we’re all 19? There’s no way people are gonna believe that two of us would be married right out of high school.”</p><p>“That’s not true, Peter. People get married to their high school sweethearts all the time! You just have to be confident in the role you’re playing.”</p><p>“Well <em> excuse me </em> Ms. Hollywood Actress. Why don’t you go, Elle?” Peter leans back, smirking. <em> No way Elle’s gonna want to go undercover. Worst liar in the universe! </em></p><p>“Well, <b> <em>Peter</em></b>, I was going to volunteer to go. I checked what’s being auctioned off and as the Seraph, I recognize many of the pieces and their histories. It’s only logical I go.” Now it was Elle’s turn to gloat. </p><p>“Okay, so Elle’s going to go as Mrs. Owens. Who’s gonna be the lucky guy to marry her?”</p><p> </p><p>The team goes quiet. Everyone thinks Sam should go. It wouldn’t be hard for him to pretend to be in love with her. But if they all volunteer him at once, it’d become very obvious what their plan is.</p><p>Elle shifts in her seat uncomfortably. It’s not like they’d actually be married, so why isn’t anyone saying anything? </p><p><em> “You know why,” </em>Seraphina whispers in her head. Elle promptly shakes her head, dispelling Her voice. </p><p>“I’ll go.” Sam breaks the silence as he kicks his feet up on the armrests of Elle’s seat, a pet peeve of hers.</p><p>She pushes his feet off, “Okay. We’ll leave tomorrow at 0600 hours. The flight’s around 6 hours long so make sure you’re ready to sit for that long. Oh, and don’t forget the time difference.” With that, Elle excuses herself. </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Sam was bored. Insanely bored. Indescribably bored. He had paced the entire length of the quinjet at least 100 times.</p><p> </p><p>“That’s why I told you to be ready,” Elle tells him, not looking up from her book. She had her legs up on one of the seats, and a few books on the ground next to her. Sam groans and slides onto the floor. He reached over and picked up the book on top. He stared at the cover, trying to decipher what it said, but he had no luck. Elle catches him and watches him try to deduce what the book could possibly be about. He scans both covers, the spine, the first and last couple pages. </p><p> </p><p>“How the hell do you know how to read this?”</p><p>Elle puts the book she was reading down and takes the one Sam is holding.</p><p>“This is a book from Aakon. I think…” She pauses and looks at the cover. “Yes, Tillroth brought it to one of the sorcerers in London. I went back a few months ago and retrieved the book hoping I’d get a chance to read it.”</p><p>“What, you don't remember what it’s about?” Sam gets up and takes a seat where Elle’s stretching her legs out. He rests his arms on her calves.</p><p>“I still don’t think you understand how the Seraph’s memory works. I have… a vague idea of what the book’s about. It’s like… It’s like I read a synopsis of it a few years ago? I don’t know, it’s hard to describe the memories. Some things are so vivid as if it actually happened to me, but others…” She trails off.</p><p>“I can’t imagine what it’s like having so <b>much </b>in that brain of yours.”</p><p> </p><p>She hums in agreement and then returns to her book. Sam leans back into his seat and feels the cool metal against his seat. He doesn't like flying in the quinjets, there's no comparison to the way <em> actual </em> flying feels. But flying over an entire ocean is a little... daunting. So, quinjet. He decides to just watch Elle read, there's nothing else to do. So he watches. Every once in a while she’ll mouth some words, a spell he guesses. </p><p> </p><p>“Hey, you wanna do me a favor?”</p><p>Elle puts her book down. “Hm?”</p><p>“Can you read some of that book to me? The one from Aakon?”</p><p>“Do you understand the language?”</p><p>“Nope. But you were right, I did not come prepared for this long and boring journey.”</p><p>Elle had put her other book down and picked up the dark-covered book.</p><p>“Do… Do you want me to translate it? So you can understand?</p><p>“No no… Come on, just read it out loud.”</p><p> </p><p>So she does. Sam has absolutely no clue what the hell she’s saying, but he loves it. He wonders if it’s some sort of story, with a hero and a damsel-in-distress, the way she’s reading it. She emphasizes words, gives sound effects, makes faces but the best part for Sam is the fact that she’s enjoying herself. </p><p>  </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Sam doesn’t even realize he fell asleep until he felt Elle softly shaking him.</p><p>“Oh shit. We’re here!” Sam gets up from his seat, his ass numb. Those quinjet seats are <em> not </em> comfortable.</p><p>He helps Elle unload and they walk down the ramp together. The auction was in the heart of Paris and their hotel was a few minutes away. The drive over to the hotel was quiet. Elle was still holding the book she was reading to him earlier, and he noticed she was tracing the designs on the covers, something he hadn’t noticed earlier. But it was dark out, making it hard to admire Elle. So he put his attention to the glimmering lights outside. He managed to catch glances of the Eiffel Tower, and he absolutely marveled at the lights on it. </p><p> </p><p>“You know I knew the engineer, Monsieur Eiffel ”</p><p>Sam had never turned around so fast, “You <em> what? </em>”</p><p>“Yes! I can’t quite remember when it was, maybe some lovely dinner party? Ah, he was such a friendly man!”</p><p>Sam sat there, shocked. How many other famous historical people had the Seraph met? </p><p>Elle smiled and hummed, "I’m so glad to be back in France! I’ve only been to Paris once or twice though. If only we were able to stay a little longer!” </p><p>He had forgotten she was French. She had mentioned it offhandedly after Peter had done a terrible accent. </p><p> </p><p>They soon arrived and Elle was speaking to the woman at the front desk.</p><p>They spoke in quick French, with Elle giving the woman a card from S.H.I.E.L.D.. Sam walked around the lobby and looked around. The walls were a pristine white, with some of them having mirrors on them. He looked at him in the mirror, gave a smile, and winked. Elle thanked the woman and walked up behind him in the mirror. </p><p> </p><p>She linked her arms in his and said, “Ready to go, or are you two gonna keep at it all night?”</p><p>Sam was surprised at the physical attention she was giving him, but he remembered that they were undercover now. They were married (temporarily).</p><p>He went and took her hand instead. “Ah sorry darling, you know how pushy people can be.” He rolled his eyes at his reflection. She laughed.</p><p> </p><p>They went up the elevator, walked down the equally elegant hallway to their room. Elle scanned the key and opened the door. She clicked her tongue. Sam walked in behind her to see what was the problem and he saw it quite clearly. </p><p> </p><p>There was only one bed.</p><p> </p><p>Sam scanned the room for a sofa and… nada. <em> Damn it. </em></p><p> </p><p>“Ah… I’ll sleep on the floor.”</p><p>“What? Oh…” Elle went quiet for a few seconds. “I don’t mind sharing the bed” she whispers. </p><p>Now it was Sam’s turn to go quiet. He has the opportunity to share a bed with the girl he was most definitely in love with. </p><p>“Oh… Okay…”</p><p>“I mean if you don’t mind!” Elle quickly followed up. “I just don’t think you should sleep on the floor…” </p><p>Sam smiled. “Ahh just admit you wanna sleep next to me!”</p><p>“Wh- What? No no, Sam… I just…” She blushed and held her hands up in defense.</p><p>He laughed, “Just messing with you. Come on, let’s get ready for the auction.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>The auction went smoothly. Elle was able to butter up some of the guests into revealing some of the buyers. Sam was also able to download some information from the computers in the back room. A successful mission. Being married to Elle wasn’t that hard! On the way back to the hotel, he teased her about wanting to be Mr. Owens with her again. She hummed in agreement and rested her head on his shoulder. He was going to <b>melt</b> if this mission lasted any longer. </p><p> </p><p>In the hotel room, Elle went over to turn a lamp on. She stayed still. </p><p>“Hm? Is something wrong?”</p><p>She motioned him over and showed him the inside of the lamp.</p><p>A bug. The room was bugged. </p><p>“Ah no, I just thought the mirror had a scratch in it.”</p><p>One of the weirdest lies ever. <em> Worst liar in the universe. </em></p><p>“Right well… I’m going to go take a shower. Care to join me?”</p><p>The last part was paired with a headshake, the only way her message could be clearer would be if she said <em> No </em> aloud.</p><p>“Ahh… No, honey, not tonight.</p><p>And then she left.</p><p> </p><p>Sam plopped onto the bed. Having to verbally pretend to be together is undoubtedly easier than having to fully act like a couple, but still. He had used several pet names tonight, an unspoken competition to see who could think of the most saccharine one. Of course, he won, with <em> angelbunny-boo </em> , which was just… <b> <em>barf</em></b>. He wasn’t planning on continuing this verbal romance but there’s nothing they could do. </p><p>Well, they could just get ready for bed, maybe watch some French movie and head off to sleep. Not much room for romance there. Just have to make it through an hour or two more. And that’s how it went. They ordered a pizza and watched some shitty rom-com. The subtitles were 5 seconds or so behind, so Elle would laugh but he has to wait to hear the joke. But he enjoyed himself. He didn’t get to spend time with her very often, not counting patrols. Elle stretches her legs and yawns.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m gonna…” she pops a joint, “gonna go to sleep now.”</p><p>“You can usually stay up for ages, what’s got you so tired now?”</p><p>She peels back the sheets and gets in, “Don’t like parties”.</p><p>Sam gets up and turns the lights off, “I really don’t think you can call that auction a party though. Lots of standing around, eating lots of hor d'oeuvres.”</p><p>Elle feels the bed shift as he gets in, “Hor d'oeuvres.” She corrects him.</p><p>“What? I said it right!”</p><p>She giggles, “You absolutely did not.”</p><p>“Okay, okay, Ms. France.” He mock-surrenders</p><p>They lay there staring at each other. Quiet. Sounds of the city come in muffled. </p><p>“Honey?”</p><p>“Hm?”</p><p>Another beat of silence.</p><p>“Nevermind.” Elle goes to turn around but feels Sam’s hand on her hip, pulling her back down.</p><p>“Nuh-uh, no neverminds. What were you gonna ask?”</p><p>Elle’s thankful for the darkness that covers her blush, “Okay well… Do you love me?” </p><p>Sam’s heart stops. Was this part of the disguise? Was she genuinely asking him?</p><p>“Yes.” He strokes her cheek. “Yeah, I do.”</p><p>Elle unconsciously leans her head into his hand. She lets out the softest <em> oh</em>, Sam’s ever heard.</p><p>“Why’d you ask?” He’s speaking in whispers now.</p><p>“Oh, I…” Elle blinks. “I can’t remember now.”</p><p>Sam realizes that he did something wrong. Elle looks… surprised. He’s almost proud of the fact that <em> he </em> surprised <em> her. </em>He pulls his hand back and turns on his side.</p><p> </p><p>A car honks outside. </p><p>God, he wishes he hadn’t taken on this mission. He knew he was in love with her and he went on a mission that involves them being romantically involved? He should’ve known that this wouldn’t have helped.</p><p>Another car honks. It’s longer this time.</p><p>
  <em> Jesus Christ, it’s midnight and you’re honking. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He’s almost asleep when he feels Elle’s arms around him. He stiffens at her touch and this time it’s Elle that regrets her actions. But he relaxes into her. </p><p> </p><p>“Sam?”</p><p>“Hm?”</p><p>“I love you too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>the team owes peter $100 </p><p>----</p><p>this was pure self-indulgence, sorry not sorry</p></blockquote></div></div>
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